The Curse of the G20 Summit

The Curse of the G20 Summit is a 2018 political fantasy comedy novella by Patagonian writer and author Lane Parsons, published on June 7, 2018. The novella revolves around a fictional G20 summit falling victim to a curse from an ancient Hawaiian king, and fictional British Prime Minister Tim Warwick's adventure with his Indonesian counterpart to lift the curse himself.

Plot
In Honolulu, Hawaii, the G20 summit opens with world leaders arriving in suits and dresses. At the gala dinner, an explosion rocks the venue, and a mysterious green light appears above. It is revealed to be King Wakahaka I, an ancient Hawaiian king who possesses black magic powers. He then declares that individual curses will be put on all the attending world leaders, which will only be lifted if they agree to join his army in a formal ceremony to take place at midnight, and he flees into the night.

The leaders become scared, and their fears are confirmed. German Chancellor Rudolf Kriewitz turns up sick the next day with festering barnacles that will not go off. On the same day, Patagonian Prime Minister Don Teigen complains of a stiff arm, and when he tries to bend his arm, it causes him excruciating pain. He then notices a graying area on his skin and cracks, and he notices the grayed area on his arm has a stone-like texture. Teigen concludes that he is being cursed with petrifaction.

Soon enough, the world leaders have all fallen victim to their own curses: Canadian Prime Minister Anne-Marie LeBlanc complaining of white streaks in her hair due to her curse being rapid aging, French President Jean-Renald Lucas slowly turning into an octopus, and Italian President Carlo Signorini slowly turning into a plant monster.

The other world leaders, having lost all hope that their curse will even be lifted, are not convinced by Teigen's warning that allowing themselves to join Wakahaka's army will give him enough power for world domination. British Prime Minister Tim Warwick finds out he has not yet been cursed and wakes up from a vision of Polynesian deities calling him the "chosen one" to end the curse.

Warwick and his Indonesian counterpart, President Rizwan bin Jusuf Othman (who is becoming a lizard) choose to set off on an adventure to the forests of Hawaii. Guided by Warwick's constant visions of the deities and the location where the ceremony is to be held, the two are put on a race against time to stop the world leaders from joining Wakahaka's army and allowing him to achieve immense power.

Warwick has another vision. In this one, he is told by the goddess Pele that the Heart of Kamakaia Pau, an artifact said to be the only thing that can get rid of Wakahaka, is in a cave and must be used against Wakahaka. He and Rizwan retrieve the stone from a legion of sentient coconuts wielding spears, and possessed press members who were converted into guards. Once he has the stone, Warwick puts it in his wallet before advancing to the ritual site, atop a hill overlooking the city of Honolulu.

Meanwhile, the summit host, US President William Harris, shocks the press and other attendees by saying they will agree to join Wakahaka's army. This summons Wakahaka, who puts the world leaders in a trance and leads them to the ceremony site. Warwick and Rizwan arrive on top of a hill overlooking Honolulu where they have been led to by Warwick's visions. He realizes the hill they are on is the site of the ceremony, which is an ancient Polynesian ritual to gain god-like powers being performed by Wakahaka himself.

The entranced leaders finally snap out and realize they must perform the ritual to end their suffering. Warwick almost stops the ritual, begging Wakahaka to leave the leaders alone, although he refuses and ruthlessly tortures Warwick, saying he will keep on torturing him until Warwick gives him the Heart, despite Rizwan's insistence. Warwick chooses to comply with Wakahaka's orders, later lamenting to the Polynesian deities that he failed them, and gives Wakahaka the Heart.

Wakahaka smiles and, wearing the Heart as a pendant, regains physical form. He reforms Rizwan and Warwick with his dark magic, turning them into his obedient minions. The ritual finally commences, and the press report a mysterious green light flashing over Honolulu as the ritual progresses.

After a flash of light, the leaders have their curses lifted, albeit only partially (as the curses they were afflicted with became the basis of their new dark magic prowess), and at the expense of their freedom as they are enslaved. They are also put in traditional Polynesian clothing and are renamed, before developing amnesia and losing the ability to speak in their native language, instead speaking an aggressive-sounding mix of Maori and Hawaiian which Wakahaka calls "proper Polynesian".

Wakahaka instructs the brainwashed leaders to gather ingredients to make an elixir that would bring him godlike powers, and they do so, gathering herbs such as lehua flowers and hibiscus (grown by a brainwashed Signorini), wood from various trees, and others. Wakahaka then drinks it and gains his godlike powers, causing Honolulu's nearby volcanoes to erupt. He then puts the entire population of Hawaii in a trance and reverts the island into a "traditional Polynesian" state, complete with new names and new attire and a different language.

The epilogue reveals that Wakahaka claimed much of the world shortly after, much to the anger of the Polynesian gods who vowed to overthrow Wakahaka and undo the changes he caused to the world. The epilogue also acknowledges that none of the events in the story are real due to magic being unbelieved in.

Leaders

 * Tim Warwick, the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom chosen by the Polynesian gods to stop Wakahaka from taking over the world using an ancient ritual, using a magical stone called the Heart of Kamakai-a-Pau. He gets defeated and brainwashed along with his partner Rizwan in the end by Wakahaka after giving him the Heart, and renamed Kaha-Ikaika, the muscle-bound chief of Wakahaka's army.
 * Rizwan bin Jusuf Othman, the President of Indonesia who helps Warwick in his mission to prevent Wakahaka from achieving godlike powers and taking over the world. In the end, he gets brainwashed as well, after Warwick reluctantly gives Wakahaka the Heart and gets himself brainwashed in the process. Wakahaka renames him Keahi afterward. His curse was a gradual lizard transformation, after which his newfound lizard traits were carried with his Keahi form.
 * William Harris, the President of the United States. His curse was a gradual cetacean (dolphin) transformation that had him stay in the swimming pool of the hotel where the gala dinner is being held. His curse was later lifted by Wakahaka after he had been brainwashed, however. His Polynesian name is unknown, as with the other leaders aside from Warwick and Rizwan.
 * Anne-Marie LeBlanc, the Prime Minister of Canada. Her curse was rapid aging which caused her to complain of weakness, dementia and gray streaks in her hair. Her youth was only restored when Wakahaka brainwashed her, albeit she gained the ability to change peoples' ages using a touch and certain chants.
 * Rudolf Kriewitz, the German Chancellor. His curse was festering barnacles that caused bleeding on the areas where they were plucked out of. Once brainwashed, he gains the ability to cause barnacle growth on surfaces he touches.
 * Jean-Renald Lucas, the President of France, whose curse involved a gradual transformation into an octopus.
 * Carlo Signorini, the President of Italy, whose curse was slowly becoming a plant monster. After he was brainwashed he gained the ability to conjure up flowers with his own touch. He uses the ability to grow the herbs needed for Wakahaka's ritual.
 * Ryu Kitama, the Prime Minister of Japan, whose curse was gradually transforming into a lava monster (later demoted to humanoid lava creature after being brainwashed). His name translates to "dragon yellow-ball", referencing the Dragon Ball manga series.
 * Bin Qiling, the President of the People's Republic of China, whose curse was transforming into a bird (a Hawaiian honeycreeper to be exact). He later gains the power of conjuring up animals in his brainwashed form. His name is a word play on "bing qi ling", the Chinese characters for ice cream.

Other characters

 * King Wakahaka I, a forgotten King of Hawaii whose name was blotted out from all public memory due to his association with dark magic. He places a curse upon the leaders attending the G20 summit with their own curses. After brainwashing them when Warwick chooses to accept Wakahaka's offer, the curses they receive become their powers. In the end, Wakahaka takes over the world, much to the anger of the Polynesian gods.
 * Members of the Polynesian pantheon:
 * Kāne, the highest of the four central Polynesian deities. He is usually friendly but often gets pissed.
 * Kanaloa, god of the oceans who is more laid-back and stoic than the rest of the pantheon.
 * Lono, god of agriculture.
 * Nāmaka, the sea goddess. She behaves like a stereotypical "e-girl".
 * Pele, goddess of fire and volcanoes, who gets easily angered. When she is angry, regardless of anger level, only one volcano erupts - the one on top of her head.
 * Poliʻahu, the goddess of snow. She is more deadpan compared to Nāmaka.

Ingredients used in the ritual

 * Venom from a jellyfish
 * Lehua flower petals
 * Frangipani flower petals
 * The wing of a Kamehameha butterfly
 * Flesh from a shark
 * Beach sand
 * Wood from a lehua tree
 * Dried hibiscus petals
 * The Heart of Kamakaia Pau